The Fine Line Between Fitting In and Standing Out
There’s a paradox at the heart of branding: brands want to be unmistakable, but brands also want to be understood. Too much sameness and everything blends together. Too much difference and you risk rejection. High-performing brands understand and exploit this tension.
How People Judge “Fit”
When people encounter a brand, they are not consciously evaluating design or copy. Our brains are wired to minimize energy expenditure and avoid perceived risks, which means we look for patterns and default to the familiar. When something breaks a pattern, we shift into alert mode. That can be useful for grabbing attention, but it is not sustainable as a strategy for building trust.
Seth Godin famously used the analogy of a “Purple Cow,” something so unusual you cannot help but notice it. The problem is that once you notice it, you have to decide whether you trust it. Would you take a chance on milk from a purple cow when you have an entire history with conventional ones? At what point on the color spectrum does the cow stop being interesting and start signaling risk? That is the tension great brands understand.
Our decision-making follows a sequence of unconscious filters. First, we ask: What category is this? That is categorization, and it happens almost instantly. If the cues are clear enough, we then ask: Is this credible within that category? Only after those two gates are passed do we consider: Is this the one I prefer?
That sequence matters. Many brands never reach the preference stage because they fail at the earlier filters. If a brand does not fit the category, it is dismissed as irrelevant. If it seems to fit but lacks credibility, it is recognized but not chosen. Over time this compounds, as we increasingly run on autopilot and return to the brands that were familiar to us first.
Distinct vs. Different
Distinction is not just being different; it’s being different in a way that people notice, remember, and come to associate with you. The Ehrenberg-Bass Institute has shown that brands with distinctive assets (shapes, colors, typefaces, mascots, phrases) are more easily recognized and recalled, and that this drives purchase preference. Distinction only becomes an asset when difference is reinforced consistently over time and clearly attributed back to the brand. This is why a one-off visual trick or campaign rarely moves the needle. It might spark curiosity, but without repetition it does not become distinctive. Different fades quickly unless it is owned.
A Mental Model for Brand Distinction
Differentiation*
The difference is calibrated, meaningful, and relevant to the category and customer. It's not just being different, but being different in the right way.
Exposure
Distinction isn't built with a one-off campaign but through sustained visibility and exposure.
Attribution
The importance of the difference being clearly linked back to the brand.
Time
Consistency over time solidifies, builds, and amplifies the impact of the other elements.
Why “Too Different” Becomes Irrelevant
Returning to the mental model above, when something falls too far outside a category’s convention, our brains often exclude it altogether. In psychology, this is described as a boundary effect: the mind treats the anomaly not as a candidate for selection, but as an error to discard.
Imagine the freezer aisle of chicken nuggets. A package with a clinical look may draw attention, but in a category designed to feel warm and appetizing, it won't be noticed in a way that helps it get chosen. This illustrates a crucial point: while standing out is important, a brand must also fit within its category's conventions to be understood and considered.
On the other end of the spectrum, leaning too heavily on category norms may feel “safe,” but it produces brands that are invisible. Think about searching for a software solution and finding yourself on site after site that looks and sounds the same. In a sea of near-identical promises and visuals, it becomes nearly impossible to tell one option from another, let alone remember which stood out.
The Challenge of Standing Too Far Out vs. the Danger of Blending In
Left: Simulate® packaging breaks category convention, but in a way that is likely unappealing to the core customer need.
Right: A series of B2B Saas websites all leverage the same category design cues, blending together, and failing to signal distinction.
The Work of Calibration
For all the emphasis on product–market fit, the overlooked companion is brand–customer fit. This is not only about fitting a category, but about fitting into the customer’s life: their repertoire of trusted brands, the occasions in which they make choices, and the cues they rely on to make those choices quickly.
Distinction has to be calibrated. A brand must be different enough to be noticed, but also familiar enough to feel credible in the context where decisions happen. Too much novelty and it risks being dismissed as irrelevant. Too much conformity and it fades into the background.
Think back to the freezer case full of nuggets; a clinical-looking package may stand out, but it stands out in the wrong way, failing to signal “food you want to eat.” Lasting brand value is built in understanding and managing that tension—calibrating difference so the brand is noticed, remembered, and still trusted.
Working through that nuance is difficult from the inside. Push too far and you risk novelty without relevance. Stay too close to category norms and you create the illusion of safety while blending into the crowd. For many brands, and especially for the stakeholders shaping them, the pull toward convention instills a (false) sense of comfort that ultimately limits growth.
An outside partner who understands both the psychology of categorization and the discipline of building distinctive assets can help strike the right balance: different enough to be noticed, yet familiar enough to be trusted. That balance is what keeps brands in the consideration set, whether the category is SaaS, apparel, or chicken nuggets. The challenge is not choosing between blending in or breaking out, but learning how to calibrate distinction. Brands that master that tension are the ones that get remembered and ultimately chosen.
